Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Engaged! And not freaking out...

January 1st 2008 My Sweetie asked me to Marry him. And I am totally stoked!

The hard part is, planning, He is a Marine so his schedule is, tight and unknown, and I work at my families business so, I don't really get vacation days. His phone got left in my car, so I can't call him. Hopefully he will get internet and a mail box next week so i can actually contact him and mail him his phone.

To add to my "Non"-freaking outness, His family are not LDS, so we need to plan this in a way that includes both halves. He really wants to get married where his mom can see him get married, but to me if I don;t marry him in the Temple, we wont really be married. Legally we would but Spiritually and in my heart... we wouldn't be. Plus I have always planned on getting married inside the Temple.

So I need to be able to have a good long planning and talking and discussing of what we can do, and I have tried really I have to be ok with the getting married outside the Temple then waiting and getting sealed inside later, It just doesn't feel right I am not comfortable with it.

It would be faster and we could be Legally married sooner if I am able to reconcile getting married outside the Temple first.

what i really need to do, is talk to my Bishop. Problem with that is, I have been inactive, because, While i still deeply believe in the Gospel and follow the teaching of the scriptures, I don't feel like I belong in my ward. I was really hurt in my last ward when they rearranged the boundaries and the Bishop of that ward told me I didn't belong in that ward and that I should be going to a different ward; not only did all my friends in that ward get moved to a completely different stake, but then I was separated from the other people I knew in that ward. All of the support I had built up and relied on was pulled out from under me so yes, I fell a bit. The ward I am in now, I haven't really gone to in nearly two years now.

What it comes down to I guess is, that even if we decide tomorrow that we want a Temple marriage first, we still have to wait a year. Then again, it might take us that long to get everything figured out and planned anyway...

Still excied and happy and i am looking a dresses and thinking of what we can do, and what we need to do...

and trying very hard to not let that I can't answer questions about when the date is or what our colors are or where we are registered bother me. Its new  and I want to linger in the happy of it first :P

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